Parenting Styles

One thing that comes to mind about morality is parenting styles.  I have heard several times from the people that I work with, "when I was a kid my parents would smack me for saying something like that!"  However I wonder how much of that is exaggeration.  I think that most of us want what is best for our children.  When they are born we instantly love our children.  Those adorable tiny fingers and toes.  We are not thinking about how we are going to discipline them.  We are thinking about how we are going to get sleep later!  As our children get older we have to set limits and boundaries.  We do our best to keep them safe by not letting them jump off furniture or out of a tree.  The time always comes that we have to decide how we are going to enforce our rules.  When our children do something wrong many of us have a first reaction of "what are you thinking?"  The hardest part is keeping your cool and not going overboard.  Studies show that children respond better to someone who is warm, caring and consistent.  The best way for a child not to repeat a behavior is to not only reinforce the behavior you want them to display but to tell the reason behind you wanting the change.  Even my four year old will remember what I have told her about things that could possible hurt her.  When we become punishing in our parenting style it is not that effective.  Harsh punishments give children aggressive models.  Remember when you were younger and your parents would punish you?  Did repeat the behavior or did you just get better at hiding it?  We want to reinforce the positive behaviors with our children.  This will increase the likelihood that this particular behavior will be repeated.  What type of discipline we use with our children now will likely be passed on to our own children.  Now I am not saying that we should talk our children out of the middle of the street when a car is coming.  I am going to grab my children out of the street before they get hit!  There are times that we will be strict and use punishment.  We just need to make sure that we are always talking to our children.